Having Metastatic Breast Cancer has kind of prepared me for COVID, in a weird way. The uncertainty of it all. What has changed for me now is I’m more dependent on other people than ever before.
Having cancer innately makes you more aware of your health anyway. I work from home and am used to a lower-key lifestyle. But COVID has brought on a new set of challenges. I am no longer able to go to the grocery, so I have to ask for help or have items delivered. My finances have also been impacted too. I think the financial impact could last me the better part of a year. Luckily, I’m still able to receive treatment, although I’m hyper aware of taking all precautions when going to treatment. Any testing and scans I have to do alone. The isolation is tough, it’s just me and my daughter here – I don’t have any adults to chat with at the end of the day.
I was diagnosed with Metastatic Breast Cancer 3 years ago. I had been getting regular checkups and thought I was doing all the right things. My doctor mentioned that I had dense breast tissue, but never mentioned that dense breast tissue may make it more difficult to identify any issues. Once she did identify there was an issue the cancer had spread. It was such a whirlwind. You have to look at all your treatment options, talk to lots of doctors, and all of that. But you also have to come to terms that plans you have made as a parent, very likely won’t happen. Graduations? Weddings? I probably won’t meet my grandkids.
Someone referred me to Lara from Hope Scarves and I was excited to see an example of someone living with Metastatic Cancer. Everything with this diagnosis was so new for me and I didn’t know what it was going to mean for me, and seeing Lara living a very full and vibrant life with MBC gave me hope. The thing about women with MBC is that we are in it for life, there’s no finish line for us.
I’ve sent Hope Scarves to other people upon a new diagnosis. It’s a tangible thing I can do. Hope Scarves has created a community of connection that helps me know she’s not the only one going through this.
I get out of bed for my kids, but I definitely find more hope in the little things. A good conversation, the sunshine, the birds singing. I find a lot of hope in the little moments. My biggest hope for the future is that my treatments keep working and I can be here for as long as I can.
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